Coad's Caribbean Chronicles: Grace moments in our time of grief

Grace moments in our time of grief
by Dale Coad

Dealing with critical illness with the grave possibility of death in the family vividly reminds us: we desperately need God! In those vulnerable moments God whispers His assurance and love. Last month, Patti and I walked through the sickness and death of her mother. God's love sustained us with precious grace moments and Holy Spirit nudges.

Here is the journey: Patti's sister called, "Mom's in the hospital and not expected to make it through her fourth surgery." We were in Costa Rica and her mom in California. Time and distance were not on our side, but God was. Patti left Costa Rica to be with her mother in record time.

Meanwhile, I was perplexed about how and when to join Patti. MT/MR in AGWM's busiest time of the year. I was scheduled to be in Springfield while Patti was with her dying mother in California. Should I fly out right away? Should I wait? Without knowing what would happen, how does one plan? Byron Klaus, one of the featured speakers at the Compassion forum in Costa Rica prayed with me, "Jesus, Patti's mother's life and death are not only in your hands but also in your timing." The Spirit used that phrase, "in God's timing" to encourage me to wait on God for His timing.

As Psalms 27:14 (NIV) says, "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

By God's Grace, Patti's mom survived the surgery with enough clarity to determine the limits of her own medical treatment and to depart this life with family by her side. She died in peace with Jesus and on her own terms.

In her mother's last days, Patti needed wisdom for the planning. She did not know the area but sensed the Spirit's leading to call a local Assemblies of God church. God gave us another grace moment. Jill Valdez's response (the pastor's wife) was endued with such love and support that Patti knew God had pre-arranged this contact. Within a short time, the church was offered for the memorial service. What Patti did not know in making her "random phone call" was that Jill was also a hospice nurse! These grace moments were not random but orchestrated by God.

The memorial service was far from our colleagues and missionary support group. God's reminder that we were not alone instantly overwhelmed whatever feelings of remoteness that we may have had. We walked into the church greeted by a dazzling array of flower arrangements from Cuba, Haiti, ChildHope, AGWM and the LAC offices, colleagues all. Right then, a florist walked in with a curious expression on his face, "These flowers are all the way from the Dominican Republic. I had to bring them in myself to see how someone from so far away knows this sweet lady." In that very moment, our colleague were with us in spirit and we felt their love.

As we deal with grief and loss, let's be aware of those grace moments and the gentle nudging of the Holy Spirit. We are not alone. We are not left to our own decisions. God is with us and He has a purpose for us. As the Voice version of the Bible expresses it in 2 Corinthians 1:4, "(God) consoles us as we endured the pain and hardship of life so that we may draw from His comfort and share it with others in their own struggles."

In our times of grief, let's look for those grace moments. When others are grieving, let's be sensitive to be their grace moments.